This past week, local relay race “The Buck Fifty” and everyone’s favorite virus “Covid-19” joined forces to help take our town’s breath away on July 25th.
“I just figured “Why beat em? Join em!”” Said race coordinator Dave Huggins said to the media this past week. “Covid really did us dirty in the first half of the year, but I reached out to their folks and said “Why don’t we work together to really say “Fuck social distancing?!” To which Covid replied “Isn’t that the point?””
When news of this merger happened, we asked Huggins why they would merge with another competing entity.
“I just felt like if we’re going to run during July, we should up it up a notch and run alongside Covid. Because let’s be honest. We’re runners. We run in the rain, the snow, and we should be able to run during a pandemic and bring it home to our families and friends.” Said Huggins salivating at the mere thought of a relay race.
We brought up the negative publicity The Buck Fifty would get from supporting Covid-19 and we talked to Covid directly about it.
“We are already took down First Thursdays and the Ross County Fair…which was like winning the Super Bowl in pandemic standards. Watching this unfold is like the weirdest episode of “Amazing Race” ever.” Replied Covid.
“We understand what people might say, but the fact is…when will you ever be able to run in 105 degree heat during a pandemic? It’s what you pay 100 dollars for and isn’t that what a runners mentality is all about?” Said Huggins either sweating from heat or covid symptoms.
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